I sang in a concert that the Choruspondent’s Choir gave last Sunday at the Hollywood Playhouse.  We had a good sized audience and were preceded by a Solo Soprano who was entertaining and had a beautiful voice.  I was concerned that my opening solo for the Choir’s first number would suffer by comparison with this professional lady who also had the help of a tenor with a beautiful voice in one number.  However, with all the problems of getting forty odd members of the Choir seated and with all the accoutrements needed for costuming and where the microphone would be, the show must and did go on.

For some reason, at this performance and not at the rehearsal, the lights on the Choir were a little bright. I found that I was not as secure in the directions for me to get up and go to that microphone and begin our performance.  I’m going to give a lot of explanations here and they are not be construed as excuses.  My new glasses sat differently on my nose (the old ones these replaced gave me headaches) and I needed to tune my hearing aids to a louder volume than I found comfortable during the rehearsal.  All in all, I wasn’t at ease as I should have been. My opening number went O.K.  I started on the wrong note (either too high or too low) as usual but the show went on well from there.  I felt the program was going too fast and I was not “with it.” I had a hard time following the music on my lap and the order of the songs suddenly was not familiar at this time.

I had several pieces to do in the remainder of the program.  One was a spoken part that I thought I handled well along with motions and grimaces under a cowboy hat to give my part color.  Then, it all came apart because I froze, did not know where my part in the music began in a duo with a fine musician and lady, Sallie Reider.  I dimly perceived voices behind me, heard the conductor, Helene Endzweig giving me the words and Sallie pointing to where I should be.  Now, here is the professional part.  I did not melt in a puddle with stage fright for there was none.  I just didn’t know where to look for my cue.  Sallie pointed to the music and Helene said in just the right tone, “Why don’t we begin again?”  That did it. I found my words and my voice was strong and Sally and I sang the duet and it was finished without any more mistakes on my part and we were two songs from the end of the show.

Over fifty years ago in a concert in Newark, NJ I had a small solo part in a post high school chorus.  I drifted off and awakened to find the conductor, the choir and the audience all holding their breath and looking at me.  I knew my lines and then sang them and the moment passed without any bruised feelings but my own self esteem.  I remember the words: “Chickens are crowing on Sourwood Mountain – Hey de ing dong, diddle all day.” People are very kind to my kind - who freeze up.