Causes of Throat Lumps

North Miami Beach, FL February 18, 2001
Aaron H. Schectman

THINKING ALLOWED
Essays on issues, ideas and reflections on the times. Published now and
then, Opinions pro or con are welcome.
CAUSES OF THROAT LUMPS

I get emotional over particular things these days. Movies will sometimes do
it. Books, which will get Carol going, sometimes make me a tad weepy. But
it is human connections that will get me going anytime, anywhere and
especially with poignant moments involving children.

Take for instance yesterday at the Bat Mitzvah of a girl I really don't
remember seeing although Carol tells me her mother brought her to rehearsals
when there was choir practice. She is a small girl who, unlike a lot of her
gender at this time when declarations are made to the effect, "Today I am a
man/woman", are almost finished developing.

Most girls look forward to this occasion as a chance to dress "grownup" She
was unfussily garbed in a simple dress with a cardigan sweater although her
shoes were properly clunky. At Temple Sinai the open metalwork gates to the
ark are two stories high so the Torahs are always visible. Those gates
dwarfed her and when handed a Torah almost as big as she is she looked so
tiny and unprepared. Seeing her there made me achingly painful and proud at
the same time.

Let me explain. I felt she was too young to be taking on adult
responsibilities, which is the meaning of her Bat Mitzvah. Yet, in her face
was the outline of the adult she has not yet become. It is a fearful time
when children are asked to perform the ritual that tells the world that they
are now ready to accept an adult role. They do this by preparing and
performing ancient words and making modern promises to continue life as a
religious person. Children becoming "grownups" still have a lot of growing
up to do.

The lump in my throat was grievously painful bringing tears to my eyes
particularly upon seeing the emotion of the girl's father and mother who
were joyful in their tears. There were many things unsaid and unknown
beneath their relief that this moment had come. I understand that I am
personally through with possibilities of such familial rituals and I cry to
think this is so. Carol's Evaluation: 10 out of 10.