Now Apologize, Or Else!

North Miami Beach, Florida 3-13-2000 Aaron H. Schectman

THINKING ALLOWED
Essays on issues, ideas and reflections on the times. Published now and
then. Opinions pro or con are welcome.

NOW, APOLOGIZE - OR ELSE!

I have always suspected that apologizing was merely a means to placate, not
a solution. My eldest son, after learning to say "sorry" when as a small
child apologized to doors when he banged into them. He carried this further
by apologizing even when nothing he did transgressed correct behavior to
animals, people or inanimate objects. Remember when kids fought and one
lost? Sometimes the winner wreaked further insult by rubbing the wounded
loser's nose in the dirt. How can either rise above this?

Demanding apologies in order to assuage hurt feelings on the part of one
duelist can result in further and more drastic injury. Demanding, "You
apologize, or else", can work, I suppose. However, when equally matched
opponents square off, there is rarely need for apology. Witness the late
matches between presidential nomination candidates. They say things about
each other that in other venues would call forth scathing demands to sooth
injured psyches.

It is interesting to note the international competition of leaders who wish
to solve old, mostly attenuated problems by saying "I'm sorry". Apologies
given way after the fact accomplish nothing but uttering pro-forma
utterances meaning nothing. Many injured descendents have learned that
apologies accompanied by payment of some kind or other makes acceptance
easier.

Giving America back to Native peoples from whose ancestors this land was
wrenched would not work. They have become completely different from those
ancestors and are far too few to make governance of states from coast to
coast workable. To take it over they would have to reinvent America. They
could, of course become absentee landlords and lord it over all.

Pope Paul has done the correct thing. To some, he has not gone far enough.
For others it means that truth handed down was a lie. This is difficult to
live with. For a great many it is simply rubbing salt into wounds. For
those involved in feuds, rubbing the ancestor's nose in the dirt will remain
unforgivable forever. Carol's Evaluation: 9 out of 10.